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Author Archives: Kristina Tahnyak

Avatar photo About Kristina Tahnyak

Tahnya is a Certified Financial Planner and former Investment Advisor turned marketing and communications professional She holds a degree from Concordia University, is debt free and currently works in the field of digital marketing.

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Venus and Mars and Spending Money

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DINKS spending

Good morning Dinks.  According the popular bestselling book men and women are from different planets.  It’s true that we are completely different creatures who have to coexist in the human race.  Some may say we complete each other because opposites attract.  Some others say that the secret to a great relationship is compromise.  As one half of a couple I have to wonder which one is true – is being in a relationship a perfect match or is it a wonderful compromise?

How often do you compromise in your relationship?

Nick and I grew up together, we started dating at 19 and later this year I’m turning 34 and he’s turning 35.  My, my how time flies.  We each have our own likes and dislikes that developed over the years and I have to tell you there’s not a lot of compromise in our relationship when it comes to activities.  If we both want to see a movie or take a trip then we do it together, otherwise each of us kind of does our own thing.

My friends think it’s weird that we don’t spend all our time together, but I think it’s unfair to force my boyfriend into doing something he doesn’t want to do and I am sure he feels the same way.  If he doesn’t want to go on vacation, it won’t stop me from booking my trip and going alone.  If he wants to spend his evening watching yet another super hero movie he can definitely go with his friends.  Although I am looking forward to watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the next Avengers movie.

There has to be common ground when it comes to money

The one place in our relationship where we do always have to see eye to eye is when it comes to our money.  This doesn’t mean we always agree on how we WANT to spend our money, but we do have to agree on how we DO spend our money.  Do you and your spouse always agree on how to spend money?

Nick and I have similar spending habits when it comes to normal living expenses like our weekly grocery bill but we don’t always agree when it comes to spending outside our comfort zone.  I don’t expect that any couple always agrees on anything.

Talk with your spouse and find a money compromise

The key to disagreeing with your spouse is not to let it become an argument.  When Nick and I disagree on how to spend our money we treat it like a court of law, this is how we get through it:

We talk about it.  Before either of us spend our couple’s money on personal items or items for the home we ask the other.  Could you imagine if we both wanted to make big purchases and didn’t talk about it?  That could lead to a financial disaster.

We each plead our case.  I may not always know why my boyfriend wants to spend money on a brand new TV when ours is working just fine, but it’s important I understand why.  He may not always agree with the new art I want to buy for our living room, but after he hears my case he might just want to compromise on the purchase.

After we each talk about our spending and plead our case we come to a fair agreement – or compromise if you will.

What do you do if you and your spouse don’t agree on how to spend money?

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Weekly roundup: I wish I was at the beach

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DINKS Friday

Happy Friday Dinks.  I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this but I really love the water.  I think that’s why I love New York and Boston so much, because of their proximity to the water.  I know what you’re thinking…”But what about California?”  Yes I know California has some great beaches but to tell you the truth I think I’ll always be an East Coast Girl.

All this to say I wish I was at the beach.  I love the convenience the comes with living in a city, but sometimes I just wish I could dunk my head in the water.

What’s your favorite beach destination? 

Enjoy these great posts from our financial friends:

Budgets Are Sexy – It’s Not About The Money…

Wise Dollar – 5 Cheap Landscaping Ideas You Should Do This Summer

Enemy of Debt – Starting Over Requires a New Starting Point

Retire by 40 – How’s Life 2 Years After Early Retirement?

Fat Guy Skinny Wallet – Appetite for Destruction: 4 Ways to Reduce The Stress

Clever Dude – How Spending $13 Cost Me $600 Bucks

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Why a trip to NYC is worth it

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trip to NYC, trip to New York, travel to the big apple, travel destinations

New York

Good morning Dinks.  Remember back in May when I went to NYC and lost my bag full of stuff? Well this past weekend I went back for a vacation do-over and I have to tell you…it was awesome.  I normally don’t travel in the summer, especially to big cities, because it’s hot and overcrowded with people.  However this time I made an exception because I really needed to get away and two of my friends were happy to come along.

You know that I usually travel alone which means I have to find the cheapest accommodations because it’s expensive to take a vacation solo.  This time I had two travel companions so I could afford to spend a little extra money on food and experiences that I normally wouldn’t.  All in all my trip didn’t cost me a penny more than it would have if I travelled alone and I got the chance to experience some really cool things in NYC.

4 Must Go Places in NYC that are worth the cost

A Broadway show.  I absolutely love the theatre.  There is just something very exciting about a live show at night in Times Square.  It really makes me feel like I’m living the high life in New York.  You can get all dressed up and spend a night out on the town.  The best thing is at 10 pm when the show lets out you are right in the middle of the busiest corner in the city that never sleeps.

I know when you look at online prices to Broadway shows are expensive, I know tickets to The Lion King can cost over $200, but if you really want to go it’s worth the cost.  You can save some money on the ticket price by sitting higher up in the balcony, you usually have a view of the stage from anywhere in the theatre.  You can also visit the TKTS booth in Times Square and buy discounted tickets for matinee or evening shows the same day for under $70.

3 really good restaurants.  I normally never pay more than $10 for a meal, especially in NYC where there is a Chipotle almost on every block.  In case you’ve never heard of it Chipotle is the Mexican restaurant equivalent of Starbucks.  It’s great quality, prices are reasonable and it’s super addicting.  Trust me, try it and you will find yourself looking for the closest Chipotle to your next travel destination.

This time around we ate at Juniors in Times Square, best known for their cheesecake.  It’s $7 a slice but it’s really worth it because it tastes so great.  We also ate at Serendipity where it cost us $23 each for lunch but we got to have the frozen hot chocolate – yes just like in the movie.

We ate our last NYC meal at Eataly.  It’s a market/restaurant at the corner of 23rd and 5th Ave.   Most products are imported directly from Italy and the food is great.  It cost us over $20 for a bowl of pasta or an individual size pizza but it was good.  Then we spent additional money on pastries, pasta noodles and Gelato.  It’s definitely more than I would normally spend on food and groceries, but it was worth it this time because the cost was split in 3 so I could afford it.

Photo from Flickr

Vacation money: Pay with cash or credit card?

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travel guide, travel with cash, travel with credit card, vacation money

vacation money

Good morning Dinks.  I’m fresh off my vacation from NYC and I can’t stop thinking about how our money habits change while we are on vacation.  Do your money habits change while you are travelling.  I am not only talking about spending money, but how you actually manage your money.

I will be the first to admit that I spend money on things while on vacation that I normally wouldn’t spend money on; but that may be because when I’m on vacation in the United States I can find so many products that are not available in Canada.  So spending aside, does the way you manage your money change when you go on vacation?

Avoid using your credit card to prevent fraud

It has never happened to me but I’m sure absolute panic must take over if your credit card is declined while on vacation.  Although having a VISA, MasterCard or American Express that is accepted worldwide is very convenient the truth is we don’t know much about the risks when using our credit cards abroad.

I am not sure if the likelihood of credit card fraud is higher in foreign countries but I do know it will be a lot easier to address fraudulent charges and visit your bank branch when you are at home.  I don’t like to use my credit card while travelling for this particular reason, I also don’t want any surprises on my next statement due to foreign exchange rates.

Save on extra ATM fees

I hate paying bank fees.  I will do anything to avoid paying $2 in ATM charges to take out cash.  I usually never carry cash because I never remember where I spent it and therefore I always use my debit card whenever possible, but this is at home.

When I’m travelling and need cash ATM fees can quickly add up. I was once charged $2 by a bank for being a non-client and using their ATM.  I was then charged $5 by my own bank for taking money out abroad.  That was an unpleasant surprise.  My advice is to call your bank before you travel to find out if any additional ATM fees apply while travelling.

Carrying cash in convenient but it comes with risks

I am thankful that I have banking in the United States so I was able to use my Debit VISA card where ever we went.  Unfortunately my friends didn’t have this luxury.  One of my friends hit up the ATM twice during our four day long weekend in NYC and my second friend brought over $500 in cash on the trip.

It’s definitely convenient to carry cash while travelling abroad because you just never know if merchants accept debit or credit cards and it helps avoid paying any additional ATM fees.  However there is definitely a risk involved when carrying cash.  My friend didn’t want to leave her extra money in the hotel room in case it was stolen so she carried the wad of cash on her the whole time.  If you have a lot of cash on you there is always a risk that you can lose your wallet or get robbed.

When you are on vacation do you prefer to pay with cash or credit?

Photo from Flickr

Old money habits die hard

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bad money habits, old money habits, changing money habits

Old Money Habits

Good morning Dinks.  As you know I have had my share of money problems in the past.  I lived on credit cards, I spent more than I could afford to pay off each month (as well as years later) and I continued to apply for credit when I maxed out my existing cards.  I think we can all agree that these are extremely bad money habits.  How do you break your bad habits?

We were forced to change our old bad habits

I’m proud to say my money habits have improved over the years.  I am the first to admit that old habits (money and other kinds) die hard.  My dad says that people have to hit rock bottom before they become open to change.  After living through my financial past I have to tell you that I think he’s right.

Sometimes the rock bottom is a divorce, sometimes it’s rehab and in my case it was a near bankruptcy. Thankfully I’ve never been through a divorce (I would have to get married to my boyfriend Nick first) or to rehab but I have been through a near bankruptcy and that’s like a money divorce. Isn’t it?

We had to be open to change

Before we can change anything about ourselves we have to be open and willing to change.  I definitely was.  As I sat in the office of the bankruptcy agent I realized that I couldn’t live like that anymore.  I needed to take matters into my own hands.  I wanted to change, at that time I was ready.  I have to be honest and say I wish I hit rock bottom a couple of years earlier because it would have saved me a lot of grief and money on interest charges.  But hey, I learned from my mistakes.

A change for the better

My financial habits have changed because a part of me died – I’m a money widow.  I broke up with the old me and now I’m a new person when it comes to my money.  I save, spend within a budget and only use credit to rebuild my score.  The truth is changing my money habits had a snowball effect on the rest of my life and a lot of my habits changed.  I am more controlled in everything I do,  including eating, organizing and exercising.

Changing my money habits also changed my relationship.  We went through some hard times during the near bankruptcy because money was a constant stress in our relationship.  However we worked through it.  My boyfriends money habits have also changed over the years.

We both went from being kids in a two income household to being completely broke students to having our own dual income household after graduation and then to being broke.  Now I live on a strict budget and my boyfriend clips coupons – that’s something I never thought I’d see him do.  Ever.

Now we are set in our money ways

The temptation to spend money is always present but before I shell out any cash I think back to my past life.  Trust me when I say I don’t want to go back.  It took us five years to realize we had money problems, over three years (and a lot of tears) to pay off all our debt as we didn’t go the deed route like from places such as scotlandstrustdeed.co.uk and now we are set in our new financial ways.  I think it would be hard to go back to our broke lifestyle because now we pay off our credit card (only one) every month and save money for an emergency.

Every day I work hard to stay within my budget, but who knows one little slip up and I could go back to being broke, but I definitely don’t want to.

Do you have any old money habits that have been hard to get rid of?

Photo from Flickr

Weekly roundup: Real Estate, Income and Stuff

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Justin Timberlake

Good morning Dinks.  Tomorrow I am going to the Justin Timberlake concert.  Yes that’s right, I am 34 years old and I’m leaving my boyfriend on a Saturday night to go see a former boy band member live in concert.  Since we are being honest I should tell you that the ticket cost $190 and it’s the third time I’m going to see him in concert. Yep so that’s what my weekend looks like.

What are you up to over the next two days?

Enjoy these posts from our great friends:

Modest Money – 8 Little Known Ways We Spend Our Money Carelessly

Boomer & Echo – Do You Need A Real Estate Agent to Sell Your Home?

Impersonal Finance – You Aren’t What You Own

Financial Samurai – Increasing Passive Income Through Leverage And Arbitrage

Retire by 40 – Why We Buy So Much Useless Stuff

PT Money – 10 Essential Personal Money Management Apps

Photo from Flickr

Dinks: Are we doing it all wrong?

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not having kids, not having children, childless couple, dinks

KIDS

Good morning Dinks.  I recently went home to visit my family and friends and I spent a day catching up with my best friend from childhood.  I have known her almost my entire life, I think we met when we were 6 and now we are both 33.  We’ve stayed friends all these years because we have a lot of things in common even though I left my hometown at 19.  We share a love for scary movies but a hatred for zombie movies, we both enjoy being outside as often as possible, we both still prefer paperback books to downloads and neither one of us wants to have kids.

My best friend is more passionate about not having kids than I am.  We are both proud that we’ve made the decision not to have kids, but trust me when I say our parents are equally disappointed in us and as we get older it gets worse.  I was explaining to her that I thought there would be a time when my mother would just accept the fact that she wouldn’t have any grandchildren (my Dad has made his peace with it) but that’s not the case.

Maybe dinks are the new nuclear family

My best friend just laughed and told me she has similar conversations with her mother.  Despite the pressure from our parents I noticed that more and more couples are choosing not to have kids.   I only have one friend who is married with a kid.  All my other friends are single or in a childless couple.  Maybe we are the new normal.

My mother’s criteria has downgraded from being married, to having kids out of wedlock to adopting.  Yep that’s right my faithful catholic mother no longer believes I need to be married to have kids – that’s how bad she wants to be a grandmother.  Every time I talk to my mother about not having kids I see the disappointment on her face and I think to myself, should I be having kids?

Every  time my best friend sees a child screaming in Wal-Mart she says it’s reason 215 not to have kids.  Well at least I think she’s up to 215 by now, it’s a game we’ve been playing for a few years.  We both love travelling and packing up our things for a last minute road trip.  Can people with kids do that? I’m not sure, maybe they can.

So I started asking myself, what are we missing out on by choosing not to have children?

Online success.  Have you seen the mommy community? It’s outrageously popular.  If I had kids I would have a whole new niche to write about, share with and engage in.  I don’t read a lot of mommy blogs unless they relate to money.  I’m always curious about how families manage their money.

Someone to grow old with.  Whenever I tell people that I don’t want to have kids the initial question is always “Why?”  After we get through all the reasons why I don’t want to have kids such as I’m selfish, already set in my ways and it’s a huge financial commitment, the second question I get is “Don’t you want to have someone to take care of you when you get old?”  In my opinion that’s just not a good enough reason to make a lifetime commitment to having kids.

Do you think we are missing out on anything by choosing not to have kids?

Photo from Flickr

Do you always listen to your spouse?

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listen to your spouse, talk about money with your spouse, intimate talk

do you always listen to your spouse

Good morning Dinks.  So you’ve said I do in front of your loved ones, or if you’re like me and my boyfriend Nick you’ve made more of a virtual commitment.  That’s just my way of saying I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 15 years and we’re still dating.  The point of my story is you are committed to living the rest of your life with someone (even if you aren’t married) but what does that really mean? Does it mean you have to compromise?

I wouldn’t say that I compromise in our relationship, well at least not all the time, but I am the first to admit that my boyfriend can talk me into or out of anything.  He is more open minded and sees situations in different ways than I do whereas I tend to be very narrow minded.  When I have an idea in my head there’s no stopping me, until Nick sheds some light on the subject.

A second opinion for major decisions

Having a spouse who sees situations in a different way than you do and who sees other solutions to a problem is an asset.  I like that I can talk with Nick and ask his opinion before I make a major decision.  He doesn’t often give me his opinion unless he feels really strongly about it.  I take his points into consideration and then make the final decision on my own.  Sometimes I take his advice and sometimes I don’t.  Is this how it works in your house?

Rethinking your spending

They say your spouse is your better half.  If you are a spender maybe they are the voice in your head asking you to rethink your purchase before you buy something.  So let me ask you this, before you spend money do you consider your spouse?  I usually do.  Before I buy something for myself I consider our rent, our weekly groceries and everything we need for our home and then I decide if I still need the item I want to buy.  For better or worse Nick is the angel on my shoulder telling me to rethink my purchases.

I’m not going to lie.  Nick and I don’t always agree on everything.  When we were younger our biggest arguments were related to money.  Sometimes he is the voice of reason, but some other times he’s an annoying little fly buzzing in my ear and all I want to do is squash the voice.

Think about your investments

We keep our investments separate and I would love to say our investor styles complement each other but that’s not true.  I am a very conservative investor compared to Nick.  That may be a woman thing or it may just be a Kristina and Nick thing.  Either way we don’t agree on how to manage our portfolios.

The silver lining to our different styles is he encourages me to take a little more risk than I normally would – and it’s paid off.  I added 15% extremely high risk (emerging markets) into my very balanced investment portfolio and it helped increase my overall rate of return.

So what’s the moral of my story?  Even though you and your spouse may not agree on everything it’s OK.  I may not always agree with Nicks opinion but at the end of the day I’m thankful for it.

Photo from Flickr

Venus and Mars and Your Money

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venus and mars and your money

Good morning Dinks.  We’ve talked about how men are from Mars and women are from Venus when it comes to certain aspect of life such as in the office, but what about when it comes to your money?  If you and your spouse manage your money differently is it just a difference in your personalities or is it actually genetic?

Maybe men are more aggressive in their investments

It is said that men are usually more aggressive when it comes to money.  When I was working as a financial planner in a bank branch I had a young couple (late 20s) who came in to open individual retirement accounts.

After filling out their individual KYC investor profiles it was determined that the man wanted to invest a lot more aggressively than the woman.  He added foreign and domestic equities into his portfolio as well as sector specific investments such as technology mutual funds.  The woman didn’t want to hear anything about foreign equities.  She chose to purchase a combination of fixed income investments and balanced mutual funds.

As the couple left my office I couldn’t help but think if being an aggressive investor (aka a gambler) was a personality trait of this specific man or is it a characteristic for all men.

Maybe women save more because they’re cautious

As a gender women are said to be more cautious.  We are believed to drive slower and that’s why our insurance rates are lower than men.  So here’s the question, are women more cautious than men in general or is it specific to matters of our personal health and safety?

I think women are more reserved than men when it comes to money, at least when it comes to the possibility of losing money with investments.  I think women may be more comfortable spending money (aka spending on a shopping spree) but we don’t consider that a loss.  Actually it’s the contrary, we consider shopping money well spent.

Maybe men are more likely to negotiate a price

I honestly, truly believe that I overpaid for my new car because my boyfriend didn’t go with me.  I feel the sales man took advantage of the fact that I was a single woman and he knew I probably wouldn’t aggressively negotiate the price  – and I didn’t.   He quoted high (standard sales practice) and since I didn’t negotiate I overpaid.

I didn’t know that the price of a new car was negotiable and trust me when I say I learned my lesson.  I bought my car in 2007, sold it in 2010 and now I negotiate everything.  Not in a cheap way, just in a smart with money kind of way.

Men as a gender are more likely to be comfortable negotiating a purchase price.  I feel it’s a sign of marking their territory.  Negotiating a lower price (no matter the amount) gives men a sense of pride.   I have to admit the one thing I will always negotiate is my salary when I start a new job.  I have absolutely no problem showcasing my assets in exchange for more vacation or higher pay.

Photo by Flickr

Weekly roundup: Retirement and Debt

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FRIDAY

Good morning Dinks and Happy Friday.  We found some great posts for you to start your weekend off with some good reads.  Enjoy these posts from our personal finance friends.

Money Talks News – The New American Dream: Getting Out of Debt

Budgets Are Sexy – Challenge Everything

Money Smart Guides – Types of Short Term Investments

The Jenny Pincher – Conventional Retirement Planning May be Dangerous to Your Wealth

Blonde & Balanced – 3 joint credit card myths

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