Good morning Dinks. Let me ask you a question, have you ever been to couples therapy? You don’t have to answer out loud but I am just wondering how hard Dinks work on their marriage. I keep reading about couples who take a vacation as a way to save their marriage and I am just wondering what kind of problem can be solved by a vacation.
Talking about conflict can help resolve the issue
I agree that sometimes it’s a good idea to just get out of our daily routine and get outside of our normal element as a way to refresh and recharge, but if you are not getting along with your spouse do you really want to be stuck with them in a hotel room in a foreign country? I am not so sure that is the solution.
Since we are all Dinks here maybe we can help each other out and share our personal stories to help other couples work through their tough times. No marriage is perfect and every relationship has their ups and downs but like my boyfriend Nick says if everything was lovey-dovey all the time our relationship would be boring.
Working through the issues as a couple
Nick and I don’t argue a lot but when we do it’s usually for the same reason and we most always find the same solutions, it’s almost as if it’s a part of our routine…every six months or so we disagree, we lose our tempers (really for no reason), we don’t talk for a few days and then we move past the issue. Of course this doesn’t solve the problem or fix the issue in our relationship, but at 32 years old I don’t foresee a change in either one of our personalities in the near future.
I am not 100% convinced that couple’s therapy is a very effective method because not everyone is open to talking about their issues with their spouse while their spouse is sitting right next to them on the couch. So in an effort to keep this Dinks community alive and lower the rate of divorce let’s help each other work through our relationship issues. I call them issues because issues are just a little bump in the road whereas problems in a relationship may be a deal breaker.
If your couple’s issue is money
Very often people disagree about money in their relationship. The way to work through money issues is to put personal views aside and just look at the bottom line. How much money is being spent and why? If the purchase is worth the cost of the item or if you really need the item then you have to make an agreement as a couple if the money being spent is worth the value of the item.
If your couple’s issue is work
Dinks have been known to spend a few extra hours at the office and very often this habit creates friction in our relationships. We all want to exceed at our jobs but is working longer than 9 to 5 really worth our relationship? If you and your spouse argue about your hours at the office think about this, is it better to come home at 5 pm to your loving spouse or is it better to come home at 7 pm to no one?
Photo by mikebaird
Kristina Tahnyak
Tahnya is a Certified Financial Planner and former Investment Advisor turned marketing and communications professional She holds a degree from Concordia University, is debt free and currently works in the field of digital marketing.
We rarely argue about anything of substance. It’s normally a person could have taken a shorter route to a location. Why we are running late somewhere. If real housewives is better or worse then desperate house wives. We normally resolve it the same way, someone realizes that we are talking about something stupid,then we laugh it off. Sometimes we even go get ice cream after.
We argue once in a while, but we talk it out on our own. I think couple’s therapy is a great idea if the lines of communication have worn down, but we’re not there yet. We can fight, take a few hours, and then talk it out…that’s as good as it seems to get with any marriage I’ve ever seen. :-)
Couples therapy can defintiely be a good option as long as both people are open to the idea. Thanks for reading. Have a great weekend.