Good morning Dinks. If your financial situation is less than perfect don’t fret, we are here to help. Some people don’t like to talk with their spouse about their financial mistakes because they are ashamed. Money is such a touchy subject and you just never know how people are going to react when you bring it up.
Do you talk about money in your relationship?
My boyfriend doesn’t like to talk about money, I mean he REALLY doesn’t like to talk about money. He clips coupons and pays his bills every month, but he doesn’t like to discuss our savings. He knows we both contribute towards our future on a regular basis but he has no interest in checking the balance of our accounts every day or opening our account statements to see if our investment portfolios have increased or decreased in value over the last quarter.
I guess that’s ok because I am really obsessive-compulsive about money. I log in to my online banking at least twice a day to verify transactions, check my balances and make sure that everything is copasetic. I don’t mind not talking about money after 5 pm when I get home because I talk about money with people all day at my job. My boyfriend doesn’t like to talk about money because he has better things to do. I guess it’s true what they say, opposites really do attract.
It’s not better not to talk about it
As a financial planner and as a girlfriend I don’t ever like surprises when it comes to money. I respect the fact that my boyfriend doesn’t LIKE to talk about money but people can’t always do only the things they like to do in life. I am not a pushy girlfriend (HELLO…14 years together and we aren’t even engaged) but when there is something that needs to be discussed I would like to have my boyfriends full attention.
We started dating when we were two broke students, so we didn’t really talk about money too much. Then when we started working and paying off student loans we still didn’t have a lot of money because we were in debt…big time. Then in our late 20s we went crazy with the credit cards and that was a huge mistake. We didn’t really talk about money, we just charged purchases on our credit cards and then argued about how broke we were at the end of the month because all of our income went to paying off debt. This was a huge mistake. I wish we talked more about money and learned about managing our money wisely because it could have saved us several years of grief while being thousands of dollars in debt.
So sit down and talk about it
My relationship is definitely not the normal. Not all relationships start at 19 years old and live happily ever after – I am not bragging, believe me there have been times when we both wanted to call it quits. Not every relationship has a financial planner in it.
Most happily married couples meet later on in life after they are established in their careers, hopefully have some savings and after they know what they are looking for in a spouse instead of hoping that their high school sweetheart turns into their one true love. If I was my age now (32 going to be 33 in October) I would definitely talk about money with potential mates before making any type of serious commitment. Is that just smart financial sense?
Photo by Angelo