Good morning Dinks. As you know I am all about becoming a better me. I am always trying to improve my career by going back to school and taking night classes and trying to live healthy by watching what I eat and spending as much time outdoors as I can. I am the first to admit my flaws because it gives me a chance to change. You know what they say, you can’t make improvements until you admit there is a problem.
Spending for others is a big money mistake
I like improving myself not because it makes me more likable to other people, but because it helps me become a better me and that helps my personal happiness. I am always working towards growing as a person because it helps my mental state and although that is a totally selfish reason I don’t really care. After all we are all a little bit selfish, aren’t we?
One of the major aspects of my life that I have improved over the years is my financial situation. I got into debt because I was trying to keep up with the Jones’ aka my friends and in my 20s I didn’t know any better. I didn’t know that I shouldn’t care what other people think; so I did anything and everything to be liked, which I thought would make me happy. I spent my afternoons shopping with friends and my evenings eating out with whoever was free because I thought that being popular equaled being happy. But the truth is that I was just filling a void.
Spending is a band-aid for a bigger problem
When I realized that I was way over my head I sat back and started to think, really think about why I was spending the money. The truth – as shallow as it may sound – is that I thought it would make people like me. I wanted to have a cute apartment that was always filled with candles and smelt good because I wanted it to be a place for people to hang out. I wanted to make reservations at the trendiest restaurant because I wanted to be the life of the party and I wanted to have nice clothes because I always wanted to be the girl who everyone wanted to hang out with. I came to realise several years and several thousands of dollars later that this was a huge mistake, bigger than I knew at the time.
My money, not your money
Now at 33 and debt free I focus my spending on me. I use my money to do things that honestly make me happy and I usually do them alone. I spend my money travelling to new places and trying new experiences. It gives me a break from my normal routine life and it lets me enjoy my money on experiences rather than material stuff. Now that I am older and wiser – at least financially – I came to realize that having nice clothes and the perfect apartment really don’t matter. Although I still get secretly jealous when I see the girl in the office who is always dressed like she just walked out of a fashion magazine.
Photo by lendingmemo