Head of Household…continued

by Dual Income No Kids on October 7, 2007 · 0 comments

We had so many great comments from yesterday’s post that I figured it would be best to address some of the issues brought up by a continued posting on the issue.

So many things to discuss on the subject it’s hard to know where to start….

I guess for me, so of the issue in questioning the role reversal of women earning more than men is an issue of dependence. I myself know that I would be challenged having to depend on someone entirely in terms of finances. I guess I’ve seen friends of mine have to ask their spouses for grocery money and I found the whole situation to be one that made me scream, “Never let that be me.”

So I guess when it comes down to it, the discussion is probably just as much about whether or not James is ok relying on me financially, but how I would feel in reverse. I guess when it comes down to it, I feel very happy that James and I can manage on one salary. I also deep down probably see it as a loop whole in knowing that it would make me feel better should I ever choose to take any time off.

When it comes down to I think that James & I balance things out very well and it really hasn’t been much of an issue. In fact thinking about the fact that we’ve been blogging for nearly two years and haven’t yet concerned it as an issue to discuss should be some indication.

It is true that James and I have a bit more separate finances in some terms, but our goals are joint through and through. While we might have some separate and some joint accounts, we come together when it comes to working towards our goals as a couple.

In terms of the comment made about same sex couples, in this case my job would actually pay for allowances with same-sex couples. I happen to be very lucky to work at a progressive organization that recognized domestic partners of all kinds. James and I are both in strong agreement that we wish that all organizations would approach spousal benefits this way.

On the point of who makes more money to take care of kids, we have mused on this one before. It’s hard to say for sure, since we plan to be DINKs for some time, but James has voiced that he would be open to staying home with kids if I was making more money. Though in the end we’d ideally like to find an opportunity that balances providing for both of our professional lives.

One last thing that James and I love about living on one income: dreaming about how nice it will be to go back to two incomes after having been used to being on one. We figure that for this reason in an ideal world we will continue to live at our current level for at least a couple of more years before we consider upgrading to a place big enough to move us out of DINK status. In the mean time we’ve basically managed this by my salary in Afghanistan. Thus we’ll see where things take us once James has finished with school and I’m back stateside.

Thanks much for all of your great comments, and keep them coming. I love hearing dialog from folks who have experiences to share.



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