Our Recent Battling Over Money

by James & Miel on May 6, 2007 · 0 comments


This is a joint posting dealing with a recent conflict we had over money…

Miel: Fellow DINKs will certainly hear the call of having different weaknesses when it comes to expenses. James & I enjoyed a nice weekend together after my being out of the country for a couple of weeks. This included going out to dinner together on Friday and then out with friends on Saturday. Top it off with an afternoon run to the store for goodies and a stop off at blockbuster, and that’s easily more than a hundred in little splurges here and there.

The trouble started when I picked up a task that I’d been meaning to take care of for awhile, aka distracting myself from a term paper I’ve been working on. I’ve been trying to find a place to sit in our bedroom. Currently we have no place to sit other than our bed, the one space we do have is very small and I have been trying to find the perfect piece of furniture for some time. I discussed this with James a month or so ago and he finally relented to agree that I could buy something if I wanted to. At the time I searched but didn’t find anything for the price I was willing to pay.

However, last night when I finally had found what I was looking for and James checked in to see what I was up to, he began to protest. The protest became a disgruntled dismissal as I went to bed.

The lesson I’m reminded of is at what price does being right come at. Sure, I believe that it is reasonable of me to what a place to sit and study in my own bedroom, and James believes that money would be better spent investing. Since neither of us is likely to have a change in heart completely, isn’t it best is to call a truce and manage out differences? James will chime in and share his side of the story now…

James: Miel has done a pretty good job of laying out the situation, so I won’t say anything more about how the argument got started. My feelings on the issue are the following: Miel and I have jointly agreed to reach a net-worth goal of 4 million dollars by the time we retire. Ultimately, every dollar we spend on furniture, clothing, etc., is a dollar that’s taking away from our goals.

So, while its important to balance having a comfortable lifestyle with other goals, I tend to balk at larger purchases, like the chair that Miel had in mind. That said, marriage is about negotiation so its important to have some give and take. Thank goodness my wife Miel is a reasonable woman! Most of the time we handle disagreements without too much fallout and they normally blow over in a day or so.

Miel&James



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